Bullied Girl Ends up in Jail

I think the counselor was doing what she thought was safest in the end and it was in her responsibility to report the girl. I just wonder how detailed the girl’s ‘plan” was in order to assess if she was going to actualize her detailed fantasy. I can imagine the psychological damage and trust issues the poor girl has.

She got what she deserved.

awsome i can commit and it gets deleted…what a great forum

The simple truth is if you want to stop high school violence, shooting, stabbing it starts at home with parents and how they talk about and treat the people around them and at work. Simple asshole parent bring up asshole kids which is the real cause of all these situations. If their kids where not little jerk and jerkettes you would not have alienated kid that are pushed to the brink and go ape shit. You fuck with a dog once, twice sooner or later your going to get bitten. Some people need a good swift kick in the ass to put them back in line if the parent fail a giving them the proper respect for there fellow man or woman.

In my personal experience in Ontario I would have to say that whatever you say to a counsellor is neither privileged communication nor confidential. Private therapists may be better in that they may understand people sometimes vent things they actually would vomit at if they tried to attempt. Basically – taqlk to friends and family if trustworthy and write in journals. Without prejudice is a useful phrase to have on each page. The counselor betrayed her client and showed her lack of merit in helping people. The counselor is simply crappy. I have experienced this too. I NEVER understood why counselors constantly stressed their years of experience and credentials and adherence to confidentiality. Then I foolishly accepted a newbie. Childrens Aid ended up in my dining room. I was NOT impressed. So far I have warned many many people about seeking help unwisely. Too Much Information is NOT what a counselor needs , but of course failing to sharre means you cannot get help emotionally… However suffering alone is far far better than jail, or whatever could have happened to me if I had not been really lucky.
Keep secrets from official and officious persons. Even if it hurts.

Hard to believe that those in authority let the bullying and harassment get to such an overwhelming level! Was there no competent adult in this girl’s life anywhere that could either deal effectively with the tormentors or remove her from the situation altogether?

Children do not naturally have the tools to cope with this kind of mental/emotional erosion and the fact that equipping the child was seemingly not the counsellor’s primary objectives is very telling! The child’s parents and other school staff also need to provide answers as to why this was not stopped one way or another…they have many tools at their disposal, both in regards to the perpetrators and the victim…but it all starts with good communication, and there couldn’t have been much of that going on!

My son had a brief experience with elementary school bullies and calls were made to the principal, teacher, and perp’s parents within a few days. The children were forced to discuss, in the presence of a counsellor, parents and each other how the bullying would be resolved so we were all on the same page…and that was it. It was over, and within weeks they were actually friends. Not that complicated if the lines are drawn and the consequences made very clear!

How something goes this wrong should be made the stuff of counselling textbooks; “how not to completely drop the ball and ruin people’s lives in the process”!

I also pitty the young bullies! They now have a wonderful experience in their arsenals which has taught them that they can undermine someone utterly, suffer no real punishment and laugh histarically while their victim suffers on their behalf. Bravo! Perhaps they are preparing for careers within the education system…

Wanting someone dead and having a plan on how to kill them are two very different things. The counselor did exactly what the law dictates and no one should blame her for doing her job.

Rena Virk… if you haven’t heard of her, then look it up! That is what happens when a child doesn’t speak up, and the reality is that she probably did! I was bullied at that very same school (before that particular incident) and I was told to suck it up and it was only two years surely I could handle it until it wasn’t their problem anymore.

The peculiar thing is almost 10 years later I ran into one of the girls and she remembered me, she was with one of her friends and she actually pointed to me and said “She is lucky she transferred schools, if my daughter were not with me I would kill her now” Kind of a long time to hold a grudge. All over something as petty as a guy (whom she would have gotten if she were nicer to begin with)

I believe that they should have a residential school for people who are proven bullies. If any form of physical torment occurs (spitting etc) they would have to attend classes to teach self respect, respect for others, anger management and such, they would fail a grade regardless of academic standing, be denied any scholorships they would otherwise qualify for, and if one more occurence took place they would be off to court and if convicted serve time to the age of 18 as an adult offender. Their main caregiver to pay the tab!

We can call it, incentive to teach our children right from wrong to begin with. The one thing I agree with, the bullies are let down in some way, mostly by a system that allows them use the system to their advantage.

That is just sad. The fact that she has fantasies about slicing people’s throats and that she went to see a therapist for help shows she did the right thing. Let us suppose the sensible thing (it probably is now, seeing how you are likely to be reported) was to not see a therapist and get no help … Then we get people like that beheader-in-the-bus madman, who never troubled to take his mental problems seriously and get professional help for his schizophrenia.

Let us suppose she did the “politically correct” thing and went to see the therapist and lied through her teeth and said, “Oh no, I don’t want to slice people’s throats … I am perfectly fine being bullied … I just came to you because I was told to do so …” Then, what is the point of seeing a therapist if you aren’t going to be honest to begin with? Chances are, that is not going to solve the problem … It is only going to delay the inevitable, i.e. when the girl realizes that therapy is no help and nothing else helps, she is going to go berserk and slash a few throats.

To those who say she is expected to “sort out” her own problems, that is easier said than done. She IS sorting out her problems by going to see a therapist. What people fail to understand is that the therapist she went to see is an incompetent, unprofessional and utterly worthless bloke. A therapist will understand it is completely normal for bullied individuals to have so much rage and violence in them. What a competent therapist should have done is attempt to solve the problem. Only when the therapist fails to make the girl understand that what she is thinking is wholly inappropriate must the “proper” authorities (read: school administrators and parents) be alerted. If the next line of authorities are unable to make any impression upon the girl, then I think it is time to alert the police. What we are seeing is a classic case of laziness, by-the-book thinking and “cover your ass”. The therapist simply does not want to make it his/her responsibility for treating this girl, which is bollocks, seeing how that is his/her profession to begin with.

If we jail our children for coming to us and sharing their hurt, my question would be, why would they do so. I want to thank the idiot that put her in jail, for making a bad situation worse. the message that if our children come to talk to us about there problems, we gonna put them in jail, did wonders for earning our children’s trust.
Do you really expect more, or less, children to talk about bullying now?

I think its pretty stupid of the system to do such a thing as to put her in prison not because, I would have wanted to see some stupid bullies’ throats sliced but because they are the actual cause of the whole problem. I know how it feels to be bullied although I am way out of that stage, but the point is, who the heck is to blame for the girls condition?

Don’t you think she suffered going through such a phase? And even if not that you have just made a few idiotic bullies more free and fearless about their immature act. If that’s the case then it wont be long that their throats do get slit by someone who probably is not so honest so as to tell the councilor about what they feel. Today I feel confident enough because my parents took a firm stand for me when I needed it. And one result of that is that I am a university student hundred times more success full and mature than the bullies I ran across. You can’t just take me for my word, I must have told many people I feel like killing them but then you don’t mean it you probably are just furious, and moreover its become more of an expression.

What I am trying to emphasize here is the point that more than a debate on whether the girl should be behind bars or not it should be how the bullies should be dealt with so firmly that they don’t even dream about troubling anyone else again.

Many people,including myself, were bullied in high school- that’s no excuse for that kind of behavior. Counsellors and therapists clearly explain that they are legally obligated to break confidentiality if they believe that someone, be it the patient or someone else, is at risk of being hurt. This girl is old enough to take responsibility for her actions and her words. At the age of 17, she knew that violently disfiguring someone was wrong and also knew that it was damned stupid thing to talk about doing to someone. The public is safer with her locked up.

The bullies should be charged – NOT THE VICTIM! People have got to get a grip. You DON’T have the right to abuse anyone ( rejection,verbal abuse,physical abuse – of which I DO understand! – I’ve been there…treated like garbage all my life – and it still continues! ). I now question and challenge that abuse at every turn and will never back down – I’m teaching people how you you’re supposed to treat others’, for starters, respect and inclusion are a given and an entitlement, ’nuff said.

OKay what about a 50 year old women going to a high school and flipping a 15 year old for no reason other then she can’t sand his family burning tires with our grandson in the back set and the local police say there is nothing we ca do. This crazy lady has repeated this on 4 occasions.

Actually ALL bullies should be treated like the prisoners of Guantanamo Bay were! I don’t need to specify anything beyond this! They are ONE of the scums of the Earth and are the reason why kids shoot up schools, become drug addicts or alcoholics and shit. As someone who’s been in her shoes in the past I certainly won’t judge her as everyone has a breaking point! I do admire people who turned their later success to “&F$* you” message for their tormentors but not everyone can hold it in too long and channel their rage into something else… That is the UGLY TRUTH!

I too was bullied as a child in middle school. No one there would stop it…the teachers, the counselors…even the principle…until I told my mother what had been happening for half the year. She went to the principle and DEMANDED that something be done. She’s my hero for making the physical and emotional abuse stop. The bullying isn’t what made me stronger. It was my mother standing up for me.

As a senior in high school, I stood up for a freshmen who had done nothing to be bullied. He was a sweet kid and it pained me to see some sophomore getting verbally abusive. The sophomore tried to threaten me like I was going to be scared of him. I whipped around so fast and told him to grow up before I get the entire Senior class to beat him down after school. Needless to say, that stand of courage shut him up for good. He never bothered that boy again, thank goodness, or I would have had to gather the senior class…of which I only really knew two fellow seniors.

Bullying will happen. If grown ups won’t help, get people together. Anyone who has been bullied before should form an alliance. If more than two people stand against one bully, the bully will usually back down. Our nation’s motto is “United we stand, divide we fall.” It is the same on the playground.

I am glad the girl was placed in custody, this time she had to spend away gave her time to realize that hurting someone, or killing them could send her to jail for the rest of her life. On the other hand, who are these girls supposed to have to talk to?

Now, these feelings could build up in her, and she has no release for this anger, because she is going to be afraid to tell anyone. I am sorry for all of the torment this girl is enduring. I hope that she knows that high school is only 4 years of her life. She will have the rest of her life for all of the wonderful things she is going to do, and for all of the wonderful people she will meet. High school does not define a person. These people are obviously bored with their own lives, because they have nothing better to think about, or do. Talk to them in 10 years when they are working in a gas station for the rest of their lives, and you are making millions:)

The bullies are the ones that ought to be locked up, as they’re the cause of the problem. This girl needs psychological help, to get over the emotional damage caused by the poor-excuses-for-human-beings that have tormented her.

Most of humanity are jerks. And if you think this girl deserved to be locked up and that the bullies are innocent, you’re probably a jerk too.